Plans to Go Home
by Jaidfyre
Summary: Okay, this is Rose and the Doctor attempting to discuss what neither of them are comfortable with. All of my stories are subject to change. I just hope that they are enjoyed.


"Rose?" The Doctor asked gently looking up from the book he'd been attempting to read unsuccessfully for the past half hour.

"Hmmm?" Rose murmured from her curled up position on the couch opposite him, "Yes Doctor?" she responded distractedly her nose still stuck in the book she'd been reading.

"How do you plan to get back to hi...the other universe?"

Rose's head snapped up to look at him so quickly she almost got whiplash. "Doc-tor?" she drew out the word as she tried to think of how to respond to such a query.

"Well because I've been thinking," the Doctor rushed on quickly now that the subject was broached, "you can't use the dimension cannon again. Well, technically, you could. Grammatically speaking you shouldn't now that there's been a retro-closure from the reality bomb. The way I described it to Torchwood back when...when…well never mind...is that to punch a hole through dimensions is like throwing a rock through a window. Too much risk of damage to both universes in the first place and then the walls would be weakened, you see, and we don't want any repeats of...well...you know…"

At this point Rose had found her voice and was able to reply with a somewhat frantic "Doctor!" which she had to repeat three times before he actually stopped his ramblings and bemusedly looked at her.

"Yes, Rose?"

"I really don't think that's something we need to talk about right now, yeah? What brought that up in the first place?"

Ignoring her second question all together he simply responded, "It is very much the kind of thing we need to talk about. After all, I am only human now and a wise man once said, "Time and unforeseen occurrence befalls us all" and what are you planning on doing if we don't figure this out together and then whoosh I'm gone?"

Rose closed her eyes and massaged the bridge of her nose attempting to stave off the beginnings of a headache.

"Doctor," She stated with a clear and calm voice. In all honesty, her voice was too clear and calm for his taste. "Doctor, I. . ." Rose found herself at a loss for words.

Understanding his complete lack of tact, the Doctor laid down his own book, scooted across the couch, and laid down her book for her as well. Gently he took both of her hands in one of his and used his free hand to lift her chin up to face him.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." was all he said.

At that simple familiar phrase, Rose found herself dissolving into tears. The Doctor wrapped his arms around her and let her cry on his chest, not completely understanding such an emotional response from her. Didn't she want to go back to her universe, to the other Doctor once he was gone? Insistently in the back of his head, something unfamiliar nagged at him; something human. He could almost hear Donna's voice chiding him, "Oi, dumbo! Way to be sensitive to her feelings, spaceman!" At that thought, he couldn't repress a silent chuckle to himself which quickly turned into quiet shoulder shaking laughter.

Slowly, Rose lifted her tear stained face up to him wearing a puzzled expression as she observed his mirth. She lifted an eyebrow at him questioningly.

"I'm sorry Rose. I'm still not used to being half human and I could have sworn I heard Donna in my head scolding me for being so insensitive."

Rose sniffed and allowed herself a small smile. "Tell me about Donna, please, and Martha. I am so glad you weren't alone after I…left." She tucked her feet under her and laid her head back down on his chest.

The Doctor sighed and stroked her golden head. "Highlights, okay? I still want to talk about. . ."

Rose nodded her head against his chest.

"Would you believe I met Donna right after I said goodbye to you? And I mean right after. She just appeared in the TARDIS. In her wedding dress of all things!"

As the Doctor went on to highlight his adventures with Martha and Donna, he reveled in feeling Rose's soft breathing against his chest. Occasionally she laughed and once or twice she would shiver or cry out in alarm. For a human, he never expected her to be this open to him telling her about other companions. He remembered how she had reacted when she first met Sarah Jane.

She's matured, he told himself. I met this amazing nineteen year old human girl with all this joy and wonder at life and the universe and now have the privilege of knowing the woman she had become still with that same wonder and joy.

All of a sudden he was interrupted from his thoughts and recounting by incessant giggling from Rose.

"I don't remember this story being particularly funny, Rose." He questioned her, "At least not enough for giggles."

"It's not that, you oaf." Rose said between giggles. "With my head on your chest I can hear your stomach loud and clear and I think it's trying to tell you it's hungry."

The Doctor smiled."How about some chips then, your favorite and we'll hash over some theories of how you can get back to the other universe."

Rose sighed in between laughter and nodded in agreement.

Later that night, they settled into one of the large studies in Pete's mansion. It had been months but they had yet to decide where else to go. The Doctor looked at Rose and in measured quiet tone of voice asked, "Why does it upset you to talk about going back?"

When Rose just shook her head in response, the Doctor requested gently, "It's okay, you can tell me."

With a sharp intake of breath, Rose looked up into his face and then down at her hands in her lap. "It doesn't seem right, talking to you about going back. Talking to you about a time when you will no longer be here. How can you be so calm about it?"

"Rose," the Doctor began with a soft smile across his features, "I have lived a long, long, looonnng life," Rose giggled at his exaggerated facial expressions, "longer than I have admitted to most people. I am okay with the thought that this human life that I have won't last forever. It's like a gift. As much as I look forward to the thought of growing old with you by my side, I know that being a human isn't going to be, already isn't, if I'm honest with myself, easy."

"It isn't, Why?" Rose asked somewhat alarmed.

The Doctor was pacing the floor by this time as he talked. "Don't worry, Rose. It's not anything that I can really put my finger on. It's just not the same. I think once the TARDIS is fully grown, it will be easier. It's just that…" he paused for a moment as his brain raced for the right words, "I know how much I love you. I know how much he loves you even though he can't say it. I am pretty sure I know how much you love me." He said pointedly at her arching an eyebrow at this statement and she smiled broadly at him in return. "That is why I have no qualms about helping you figure out a way to safely cross to the other dimension back to the universe you were born in, back to him."

Rose jumped up, stopped the doctor in mid-pace and threw her arms around him. "I'm so glad I met you!" she said in his ear.

With a grin that spread from ear to ear, the Doctor hugged her to him just a bit tighter, "Me too, Rose, me too."


End file.
